Put this fucking mask on and don’t say a fucking word.

I was in no hurry to meet him for the first time, I had my child for most of the week, so it wasn’t like I had a bunch of free time. He called daily trying to set something up, and I just kind of blew him off for one reason or the other. He called one afternoon to say he was driving through my town and asked if I could meet him for 5 minutes. At first I said no, the kid was home, the roommate was home, animals were going nuts...it was just really bad timing, but after much persistence, I agreed he could stop by for 5 minutes to say Hi. We had already had tentative plans for the following night, so I thought I may as well get those first meeting jitters out of the way.

He showed up a few minutes later and he was way more than I had expected. Nice clothes, nice hair, nice body. I was taken a back on how put together he was. I introduced him to my roommate and my kid. He immediately took to my child and offered to play a game of Wii together before bed. The two of them had a great time calling each other out and goofing off. As I sat there on the couch, I thought, wow..this was unexpected. It was very easy to be comfortable and things felt good being so relaxed. Bed time for the kid came quickly and we found ourselves sitting on the couch. He got a little closer and came into kiss me. There was an electric force that jolted through my body. He was an amazing kisser. Things got hot rather quickly on my couch, and I suddenly realized that I wanted this guy in a bad way. We moved into my bedroom and almost immediately things changed.

In the blink of an eye, I was suddenly his little bitch. In the mist of some heavy kissing, I was flipped over onto my stomach and forced onto the bed. In my head I was thinking, wow…okay, this is new, I can do this. It was hot and so unlike anything I had ever done. He was forceful and taking control and for once I wasn’t thinking about what I would be wearing to work the next day or what reality show I was missing. He saw my night mask hanging on the corner of my bed and told me to get it on my eyes. I giggled to myself and holy shit was that a mistake. He grabbed me by my wrists and hissed into my ear, “Put this fucking mask on and don’t say a fucking word” I giggled again…this was funny to me. This time he put his hand around my throat and said, “I’m not fucking playing with you, you’ll do as I say or you’re gonna get it even worse” I remember it was at the moment, when I started to float above my body. I was watching it all go down from up above, thinking how they hell did I get here. Is this really fucking happening? Did we discuss a safety word?

My entire body was taken over by this man. He spent a very long time down below and every time I got into it and my hands started to travel down to him, I was ordered to keep them on the fucking headboard and not to fucking move. It’s so easy to lose yourself when you are literally having one of the best fucks in your life. I was quickly reminded each time, to not talk, to not say a word, and to not act like I was enjoying it. I was cursed at and spit on, I was choked out and bit and he had his finger so far up my ass that I thought I might pass out. He bitch slapped me across the face on 3 separate occasions, and having an eye mask on makes that kind of play crazy, as I couldn’t see them coming, so trying to turn my head or prepare in any way was impossible. It takes a lot to shock me and my jaw was literally on the floor.

When he was finished with me, he went for his clothes almost immediately. I laid there with only my shirt on and the rest of my body was exposed. I could see the welts on my thighs from his bite marks starting to already turn black as if the blood vessels had been popped. When I knew it was ok to speak, I asked him if he was leaving. He gave me that little smirk and in that condescending tone replied, “What...? Do you want to fucking cuddle??” I was dumbfounded by his reply and quickly said that I happen to hate cuddling and I was just wondering why the rush. It turned out he was only heading out for a smoke and I barely had enough strength in my legs to join him. We said our goodbyes at the door and he asked if we were still on for the following night. I agreed to meet him and he was on his way.

I have to say that although I was floating above my body the entire time and most of the details are still a little foggy, I had never been so turned on in my life. This was the shit I had only read about or seen on porn sites. In my own sick little twisted way, I loved it. It was exactly the dirty kind of sex I had needed after all the years of vanilla play with my ex. And as I stood there later that night, naked in front of my mirror staring at all the bruises in disbelief, I realized, it’s one thing for your partner to ask you to call him daddy, but it’s quite another knowing you’ll probably get your ass beat if you don’t.